Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Finally, I manage to pick out a few hours to spend at the beach alone this night. I've been waiting for this moment for a very long time. At the start walked in to Pasir Ris Park, I felt something eerie. But I was not afraid and I continued strolling as I no longer bother about my own life at that point of time. I arrived to one vacant shore happily, enjoying all the sound produced in the beach which relaxed my tension very much.
I actually wanted to think about all the issues which I used to ponder sadly over for and decided to do all the wailing if necessary but the moment I reached there, all the stress were amazingly cleared. But that doesn't mean that all the stress which had just cleared will not be back once I leave the beach. Recently too many things just happened again, and I can't possibly name out all as that would bring back some undesired tension.
When I was on my way home, I messaged Valarie. Was thinking of asking her to call over, but since the night was about to end in 6 more hours or so, I decided to let her have a good time resting.
I don't know why, but my presence seems to be more trivial to some of those people whom I wish that they would give me some attention, as time progress. I suppose I can't expect more than what was once already given. When the tide is getting higher, the sea level is extremely close to me where I sat on the shore. At that time, I really feel like sliding down, and float to where ever the wave is capable of bringing me to. If I would die just like that, I wonder how big will the impact be on other's life. Certainly either not at all or appreciative.
Really had an extremely great time with my real mum today, actually the day before according to the time now. This is my first time enjoying outings with family. For the past, I would even thought that it's all almost like a burden to me. I really love kids as young as my step little brother named George. He's really fun to be with! For that girl whom I've spoken to during my ride with her at East Coast Park, I do see a change at that point of time after what I've told you. If you ever see this, please remember to maintain that way. Trust me, it'll bring you greater good in the future. Hope to see the 4 Gs soon again. They are the best siblings ever! ha! So does those staying under one roof with me. I hope that our intimacy are improving positively.
meLeonard walked through the seasons at9:06 AM

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Teo Jian Hao Leonard

09 Feb 1990

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